Hello, food karma? Is that you? Cause I don’t know what I’ve done to piss you off, but I am really, really sorry and I swear it won’t happen again. Really. It won’t.

I had a great day today. Happy, productive. All the things I like to have in a day.

Then I started dinner.

Have you ever had one of those days where something just isn’t working? Well, that was every dish I tried to make. First, there was the fantastic idea of sauteed Swiss chard with apples … turned out like green applesauce. Ew. Then there was the first attempt at cinnamon chipotle sweet potato fries. Too much chipotle. Too little cinnamon. And why did they shrink up like that?!? Not good at all. Then, there was my failsafe — the preseasoned pork roast. I thought if nothing else, that had to be good. I should have known I was in trouble when the darn package had instructions for chicken instead of pork . . .

So, everything was bad. Every-stinkin’-thing.

Yes, it does happen to me too. It’s like that one time when I had a party and made lemonade, except forgot the -ade … in other words, I left out the sugar. Yea. I make mistakes too. And they are usually pretty bad ones.

So, spill it. What’s your worst kitchen disaster?

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